The site cut my post because of the character limit. As of 24 March 2026 I have been off Lexapro and Bupropion for a month. I no longer feel depressed or anxious and have no interest in alcohol. My weight is around 105 kg and I plan to lose another 10 kg slowly over many months. The medication started a chain reaction that made me look after myself. It is not only about the scale or clothes; it gave me a sense of control in a world that often feels overwhelming. Now that I do not want to die I doubt I would have followed through with that earlier thought.
I began trying to lose weight in 2025 while dealing with depression and anxiety. I had just started antidepressants for the first time, beginning with Lexapro and later adding Bupropion. On top of that I was diagnosed with obstructive sleep apnea, which left me exhausted and unmotivated. In my early thirties I had once been fairly fit from lifting since age seventeen, training two or three times a week and seeing quick muscle gains that also helped my mood. At my heaviest I reached about 131-132 kg at 185.5 cm tall, though I had stopped weighing myself out of embarrassment. Stress from work led me to drink wine as a reward.